Wednesday, July 10, 2013

back to work...

So I started back to work on Monday, July 8... 3 months after having Kason. To say I am totally bummed is a complete understatement. Hadlea went back to daycare, and Kason is at home with our nanny. As thankful as I am to have had the chance to be home for 3 months, I am still super duper sad to have had to come back. I mean... the whole no schedule thing was pretty nice! I just worked around the kids and what they wanted to do!
 
I get the whole 'well atleast Kason is home with you' from everyone. Yep... totally get it. But my job is very fast paced. Lots of emails, phone calls and conference calls. (I came back to over 5000 emails. And that wouldn't have been all of them if my inbox hadn't filled up!) It isn't like I can go in there and hold him every 5 seconds. You bet I go grab him when I can, but it is not like I can hold him all day long like I did for 3 months! And yes, I know I am totally being a brat! I have thrown many pity parties for myself to Justin in the last week. He is well aware of how I feel. Ha!
 
Now Hadlea.... she LOVES daycare. I took off 3 months since it fell during the summer and I thought we could do a lot of things together. But that girls loves her school and friends. I might have kept her home 5 days out of the 3 months. She is just so busy, and I think she would get so bored at home with us since we had to work around Kason sleeping and eating.
 
I have been asked by several people why I chose to go back to work. Could Justin and I make it on Justin's salary? Yes! But I don't want to live pay check to pay check. I want a savings. I want extra money to run around, buy stupid stuff for my kids, take trips, etc. I don't want to have to depend on others. I have an awesome job. I am able to work out of my house full time. When my kids get in school, I will be able to take them in the morning, and they can come home after school. It will totally be worth it in the long run.... but I will sure miss my days with them....
 
my extra snuggles with these two in the mornings....
and being able to stay up late snuggling him all night! 
I am so thankful for all God has given me. It is always WAY more than I deserve. I wanted to take off 12 weeks.... 4 of them being unpaid. Justin and I talked and talked about whether I should do it, and after a lot of prayer, I knew we could. I knew it was what I wanted to do. He provided for us, like always. And at the end of the day, I am way more thankful for my family and my job than I am being sad about having to work. Having to make these decisions makes me so much for thankful and appreciative.
I received so many messages about having to go back to work on Monday. If you were one of them, thank you! They definitely brightened my day! And again... just another thing to be thankful for... awesome friends and family!

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